When we talk about preparing for birth, a common question arises:
“Can you really plan something as unpredictable as birth?”
The honest answer is — not entirely.
Birth unfolds moment by moment. But you can plan for how you’d like to feel, what you need to feel safe and supported, and how you want decisions to be made along the way.
That’s where a birth plan becomes a truly powerful tool.
What Is a Birth Plan?
A birth plan is not a strict script or a set of demands. It’s a way for your midwives and caregivers to understand:
- What really matters to you
- What helps you feel calm and in control
- What you may want to avoid if possible
- How you’d like to be supported if plans change
Writing your birth plan encourages you to explore the process of labour and birth. This exploration helps remove the mystery — transforming the unknown into something far less overwhelming.
Understanding Your Feelings and Choices
Sometimes, the strongest preferences are about things you don’t want.
This deserves space and curiosity, not judgment.
- Why do I feel this way?
- What might this option represent for me?
- If circumstances mean this becomes necessary, how can I still feel safe and heard?
These conversations are part of protecting your emotional well-being in labour — and they give your birth team clear guidance on how best to advocate for you.
Things to Consider When Planning Your Birth
The environment needs to support the physical and emotional needs of you and your birthing partner to feel safe and secure. Minimal interruptions to your neocortex (the thinking part of your brain) for the hormone release to occur to stimulate and maintain contractions.
Most women and birthing people choose to give birth in a hospital; however, birth at home is also an option to consider, and there are many benefits to being at home through your labour and birth. These benefits include feeling more familiar and relaxed in your own home, being less likely to require interventions, not needing to transfer in labour and disturbing your oxytocin release, or leaving your other children.
Things to consider regardless of place of birth:
- Lighting – often, people in labour prefer lights to be low or off completely. Some people like the soft glow of a projecting light display across the room
- Diffuser – consider essential oils to support you in labour. Always consult a pregnancy-trained aromatherapist before using oils for labour and birth
- Music – you may like to prepare a playlist of your favourite songs to calm or motivate you as you progress through labour
- Comforting props – having some comforting items from home can help make you feel more balanced (a pillow from home, a dressing gown to cuddle up in, some affirmation cards or photos of loved ones.
- Snacks and drinks. You may not feel like eating much, so pack a few snacks that will enhance your energy levels.
Who would you like to be with you in labour? Most people choose a partner, family member, or close friend to support them through labour and birth. Think about what kind of support you’ll value most — gentle encouragement, reassurance, or advocacy.
Birth settings can sometimes feel overwhelming, so having someone you trust makes a difference. You might also consider an independent midwife or a doula — a trained companion who offers calm, continuous emotional and physical support, helping you feel safe, heard, and cared for throughout your birth journey.
Consider what labour might feel like for you? While in the early stages of labour, you may experience mild to moderate cramping-type pain, intermittent and infrequent. For as long as you can continue your day-to-day activities, aim to do so. As you progress through labour and the contractions intensify, you may consider pain relief options that are only available in a hospital. If you think of the possibilities for analgesia as a step ladder, start at the bottom rung, and then you have room to step up the ladder if needed.
Utilise breathing techniques; there are many courses, either in person or online, where you can learn hypnosis for childbirth relaxation techniques. These courses explain the physiology of labour and introduce the concept of breathing techniques to support the physiology during childbirth.
Consider whether you would like to labour in a birthing pool. Benefits of labouring in the water include less need for synthetic oxytocin to increase contractions, less need for opioids, less requirement for epidural and reduced pain. If you give birth to your baby in the water, there is a reduced risk of 3rd and 4th degree tears, reduced number of episiotomies (cut to your perineum), reduced number of maternal infections, reduced risk of postpartum haemorrhage and increased maternal satisfaction (Dekker, R, 2025)
Active positions for labour, being upright, whether on a birth ball, supported over the back of the bed, or on your hands and knees, all aid the physiological process of birth. You may not know that when you are in an upright position, your bones in the pelvis can move slightly to allow the baby 28% more space to descend through the pelvis to be born than if you are lying on your back.
Then once your baby has been born, there are considerations such as whether you would like skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, and your preference for an active where you receive an injection to encourage the placenta to deliver quicker, or whether you would prefer to wait for your body to birth the placenta itself, this is called a physiological third stage.
Sometimes in labour and birth, there may be situations that occur to change the course of your preferred plan. It is important that you understand that you still have autonomy over your body, and that no decisions should be made without you. There is an easy-to-remember acronym to use when making informed decisions: BRAINS.
What are the Benefits? Risks? Alternative? Intuition? Nothing?
Your birth plan becomes a communication tool — one that speaks for you when you are focused inward on birthing your baby.
So… Can You Plan Your Birth?
You can plan:
- Your preferences
- Your environment
- The kind of support you need
- How decisions should be made collaboratively
- What wellbeing looks like for you and your baby
You can’t plan every twist and turn, but you can ensure your voice is honoured every step of the way.
You Deserve a Birth That Feels Like Yours
If you’d value support in creating a birth plan that reflects you — your values, your hopes, and your unique pregnancy journey — I would be honoured to help guide those conversations.
Book a free birth planning discovery call
You don’t have to navigate the unknown alone.
Further Reading
Dekker, R (2025) Evidence on Waterbirth: Evidence based birth. Accessed online at https://evidencebasedbirth.com/waterbirth/ Accessed on 29/10/2025
National Childbirth Trust (2019) Writing a birth plan and deciding about pain relief. Accessed online at: (https://www.nct.org.uk/information/labour-birth/pain-labour/writing-birth-plan-and-deciding-about-pain-relief Accessed on 29/10/2025
NICE (2023, updated 2025) Intrapartum Care. Accessed online at: https://www.nice.org.uk/guidance/ng235 Accessed on 29/10/2025
NHS (2023) What to include in your birth plan? Best Start in Life. Accessed online at: www.nhs.uk/best-start-in-life/pregnancy/preparing-for-labour-and-birth/what-to-include-in-your-birth-plan/ Accessed on 29/10/2025